The Relationship Between The Server and The Customer (originally published May 28, 2010)

The relationship between server and customer can be an awkward one.

Ideally, when taking a customer’s order, we’re expected to be jolly and personable. We’re expected to talk to the customer. To hold a conversation with them. Ask them how their day was, perhaps talk about the weather. Do our best to make sure they want to come back again.

 The thing is, I’m not sure what customers are really thinking when a server tries to start a conversation with them. If they’re anything like me they want to tell them, “It’s okay, really, you don’t have to talk to me. I just came here for ice cream, not for a best friend.” And then if the person is really pushing this whole talking thing I really wanna say, “Man, if you don’t shut up and make my ice cream…”

 I’d say I’m a pretty friendly server. I take my customer’s order and then I make it. If they're talking about something interesting with their friend I might interject if I have an appropriate comment. For example, if their talking about a movie they just saw I’ll ask them how it was, or if I just saw the movie I’ll give them my opinion.

The other day I was ringing up a lady and she was saying to her friend, “You know who I like? Ann Curry. She just seems like a good person.” So I got excited because I like Ann Curry too, and I said, “Oh my gosh, I love Ann Curry too! She’s my favorite Today Show anchor! She’s so nice and she’s really pretty.” And we went on to have a conversation about Ann Curry.

My point is, when the time is right, I’ll strike up a conversation, but if you seem distracted I don’t force it. My main goal is to get you in and out in a timely manner and I think that’s usually what people want.

I think we’ve all experienced that server that’s just a bit too uppity. They’re just a little too in your face.

Like when I’m at a restaurant with friends and we’re in the midst of a deep discussion, and it’s pretty obvious that we’d like to be interrupted as little as possible, especially after we already have our food, but she keeps coming over!

“Are you guys okay?”

“Yes, we’re fine thank you.”

5 minutes later…

“You guys need anything?”

“Nope. We’re good, thanks.”

3 minutes later…

“You guys good?”

“Yep… Still fine…”

1 minute later…

“Hey are you guys-“

“YES! WOULD YOU GET OUTTA HERE!!!!”

When serving a customer, I deem it best to avoid this situation. I like to give them their personal space.

On top of making your ice cream, imagine having to sing whenever a tip is dropped in the jar. Now I don't mind singing at all, after all that's part of my job description. Sometimes though it's difficult to balance the singing with serving the customer. For example, if I'm serving you and we're in the middle of discussing your order, would you want me to burst into song? Would that be a little weird for you?

Overall the relationship between the server and the customer is about balance. Doing my job competently, while making sure the customer is comfortable.

Maybe I’m wrong though. Maybe that's just me.

How do you like for your servers to address you?

I Don't Like...

1. I don't like it when people avoid my questions.
2. I don't like it when I feel taken advantage of.
3. I don't like it when you ask the lady at at The Great Cookie for $2 worth of snicker doodles and she says, "Is $2.10 Ok?" Noooo! It's not OK! I only got $2!
4. I don't like it when birds poop on my car when I'm sitting in it. Its not as bad when I'm not in the car. But when I'm actually in it, I feel disrespected.
5. I don't like it when people call me weird.
6. I don't like it when you burn the roof of your mouth and you get that little dangly piece of skin. And no matter how much you try to pull at it, it never works because everytime you try to grab it, it disappears but as soon as you stop trying it comes back down... SMH...
7. I don't like when I'm excited to see someone and I give them a nice warm, "Hey!" and they just go, "hi." It's just rude.
8. I don't like how the actors on 90210 are supposed to be in 10th grade but they are clearly grown. I don't look like that and I graduated!
9. I don't like it when people think the world revolves around them.
10. I don't like always having to be the bigger person.
11. I don't like when you're close friends with a person and then you guys drift apart.
12. I don't like when I'm about to say something and then I forget.
13. I don;t like when people beep at me and yell obscenities from their window, and all I can think to yell back is, "Yeah...Well... You're ugly!!!"
14. I don't like when people fart under the cover and don't tell you and then you lift it up and you're like, "*Sniff Sniff* did u fart?" "Oh yea. My bad." "Eww!"
• Alright so I may be guilty of that one. Don't Judge me!!!
15. I don't like watching movies with people who never get it.
16. I don't like being broke.
17. I don't like when people think Gucci Mane is cool... He's not.
18. I don't like when Beyonce attempts to act. It really upsets me.
19. I don't like when people try to spit knowledge when they're clearly wrong and haven't done their research.

There's a lot of other things I don't like. But I can't think of anymore right now.

"Excuse me sir... You have a little something hanging there..."

Hypothetically speaking...

How do you tell a customer they've got a little something hanging from their nose?

I mean, quite honestly, it's hard enough telling a friend they have something in their teeth, or on their chin becuase a lot of times they think you're being smart. They get embarrassed and then they get a little attitude like,

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Umm I just did..."

"Ok but you let me walk around with that on my face this whole time!"

"I just saw it. And besides, I didn't tell you to be a sloppy eater."

Anyway, telling a friend something that simple is difficult enough, but telling a CUSTOMER that they have a BAT IN THE CAVE... That's a whole other level.

There's a lot of different scenarios here. Many different questions.

Do I stop him in the middle of his order and tell him? Do I wait until I'm making his ice cream. Do I wait until I hand him his ice cream? Do I wait until we get to the register?

And then their's a bunch of other questions...

And how do I actually come out and say it? Do I go for the extra polite- "Excuse me sir, you have a little something right there." Do I make a sly hand gesture? Or do i go for the blunt- "Ey yo, you got a boogie."

What if he gets mad? What if he thinks I'm rude? What if he didn't want me to tell him? I mean in actuality, I'm just trying to help you out. I'm sorry, I didn't realize you valued that boogie.

So now here I am, trying to accomplish a public service, and this man doesn't like it! How is he going to show his unappreciation you ask?? He's not going to tip us! After all I went through. The stresses and emotional turmoil of deciding whether or not to let you know about that little dangly thing ya got there and you don't think I deserve a tip... Alright... That's fine...

So I've come to a conclusion...

I'm not telling! If a customer just so happens to have a little something extra on their face, they won't be informed by me. Yep... They can just walk around with that little piece of nose jewelry.

I digress...

10 Things You Shouldn’t Do When Ordering At Coldstone Creamery

Soo Basically… I work at Coldstone.

Me and my co-workers agree on a few key things that you shouldn’t do if you don’t want to annoy your server.

Yes, we realize it’s our job to serve you, but give me a break. Help me help you.

1. Pay attention to the signs when you walk in. There’s a big arrow right in front of the door that says “This Way.” Follow it.
2. Pay attention when I say I can help you. When I clearly make eye contact with you and say, “I can help the next party!” don’t stand there and look at me like you’re shocked I picked you. Yea I’m talkin’ to you! Ain’t nobody behind you!
3. Speak Up! I can’t hear you! I truly don’t understand why people think we have bionic hearing. The ghea(the thing that holds the ice cream) is loud, so if you want me to hear your order you’re gonna have to speak up! Stop whispering! And when I say “I’m sorry. What was that?” that means I couldn’t hear you the first time. So why would you say it in the exact same volume??? And then they get mad at me when I attempt to repeat their order back to them and it’s wrong. What do you want from me?!?
4. What is a Cookie “Doughnut” Ya Want Some? I realize that some of the signatures may be a little hard to pronounce, but after a while of looking at it on the menu, I would think you’d learn what it’s really called. So let me take some time now to clear up some things that you all seem to have a little trouble with.
   
   a. Its pronounced like “Cookie Don’t Ya Want Some.” Its written “Cooke Doughn’t Ya Want Some.” See the play on words there? Yea, I thought it was cute too.
   b. We don’t have Birthday Cake ice cream. We have Cake Batter ice cream which is what we use to make the Birthday Cake Remix.
   c. The “z” is silent on Rendezvous. So it’s pronounced Strawberry Banana Ron-day-voo. Not Ren-dez-vus.
   d. No the butter pecan doesn’t have pecans mixed in it. No need to yell at me. I can mix them in for if you like.
5. Tell ME your order! I find it really puzzling when a guy is with his girl and she puts in her order and then I say, “Alright and what can I get for you?” directly addressing him and he turns to his girl and tells her his order, and then she repeats it to me. She’s not allowed to make your ice cream! Believe me I wish she could! So why do you insist on the middle man? You can speak for yourself. Just tell ME what you want please.
6. Please pick a size ma’am! Alright so you get through the ordering part smoothly and then it happens! You’ve come to a cross roads in life. This is, perhaps, the hardest question you’ve ever been asked in your life. “What size did you want that in?” I mean this must be a real struggle for customers because they look at me like they’ve never had to choose the size of anything before! “Umm… I don’t know.” Am I supposed to know what size YOU want? You gotta pick one. “What sizes do you have?” I mean I feel like it’s pretty obvious. “Like it, Love it, or Gotta have it. So basically small medium or large.” “Uhh, just give me your regular size.” What is that??? Please just pick small, medium, or large. It doesn’t have to be this difficult.
7. Oh I wanted a lid on that. Well why didn’t ya say so from the beginning??? I done put a spoon in it already and everything! Now I gotta throw the spoon away. A perfectly good spoon gone to waste. Tell me that you want a lid before I put the spoon in it please.
8. Ohh I meant the cone in a cup. Alrighty, this happens every day which is why I have developed the method of asking more than once. We have Waffle Cones, and we have Waffle Bowls. The difference is… one is a cone and the other is a bowl. And we can fit any size into them, not only the Gotta Have it.
9. What?! That’s how much it is!? Uh Uh. Why is it so much?! So I’m finished making your ice cream and I’m ringing you up. “It’s gonna be $7.07.” “What?!? That’s ridiculous!” If you don’t wanna pay an arm and a leg for your ice cream, don’t get everything and yo mama mixed in it! It’s actually hilarious when ya think about it. You got a Gotta Have It Strawberry Blonde, plus the extra graham cracker and strawberries you wanted. Then you got it in a dipped waffle bowl. And then shordy had the nerve to think it was gon be $2.11!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!...... AHA! Whew! Girl you funny! You guys really crack me up!
10. You guys sing for tips right? Yes we do. But did you really expect me to put my all into that song when you only dropped a penny in the tip jar. And don’t be a jerk and keep dropping penny after penny in so that we can keep singing. It’s really irritating.

These are just a few words from the wise. This is not to discourage you from going to ColdStone. I promise this will help you on your journey to those delicious desserts you crave so ravenously! Now get out there and put these tips to good use! Have a ColdStone Day!